Episode 720-729

Jenny's plot seems foolproof especially when Dulla plays right into her "that woman's insane!" angle. Unfortunately, today had to be the day that L'Arse sobers up enough to hit speakerphone. Bad timing too, we were really digging Roman's bitchfest!

Poor naive fools. Darling peasant buffoons, even. Don't you know how things work with Roman's Evil Friend Jenny?

But has she gone too far this time? Will Jenny's family forgive her? Will EKP open a Halfway Home for Hapless Heiresses? Will Stella return to her first love, Beppo? Will Deniz and L'Arse do that sexy slo-mo walk again, but with Roman this time, wearing his long brown coat? Is there any end to these endless questions? We don't know. Go watch the ep already!

After being broadsided by a self-righteous and badly dressed iceberg, the RMS Jennifer goes down, dragging along her often-ignored sister ship, the Princess Roman, as well as 1600+ wailing subscribers, er, passengers. (If you're not wailing, just go with it anyway for dramatic effect, ok?)

Or in Richard's words, life just sucks.

PS: To forestall questions: Mike was released after some evidence showed up that proved that Bulle was the one who brought the gun and Mike wasn't planning to kill Max or anyone. It's all a bit shoddy and convenient, but oh well. Bottom line, Mike is back.

Umm...descrip... Asshole=I love you! Squee! Squee! Squee! Sorry that's all we've got. We'll be at Jenny's buffet gobbling down sushi and strawberries and squeaking helplessly.

Roman. Is. NOT. Hysterical.

How old is Roman some of you may have asked, time and time again, over and over, even when we said we didn't know and we guesstimated and then some of you would ask again even after we'd already answered on the same vid, well, here's your answer: He's mid-20s okay? MID-20s.

To those who were worried that Roman might have been hurt when he collided with stationary!Stella, never fear! It was only our Fragile Flower who was damaged. To those of you who are enraged with said Fragile Flower and her wimpy Boyfriend of Suck, never fear! They are going away for THREE WHOLE WEEKS! CHEERIO, guys! Ta now! Don't bother writing!

Stella and L'Arse go away (YAY!). Jenny squats at No.7 overnight, demonstrating that just because you're homeless doesn't mean you can't have some fun (LOL!). Marian reacts by spanking her and making her crawl around on her knees covered in soapy suds (MROW!). Except for Deniz's incidental asshattery, it's a day of squee and popcorn-munching at EKP. Come join us. Bring beer.

Stella calls Roman to grovel, apologizing for being such a total bitch to him. OK, maybe she doesn't, but we need something to make up for the horrible news that her recovery will only take two weeks.

Meanwhile, EKP is drawing hearts all over every scene between Marian and Jenny. These two sparkle!

Deniz continues his asshattery, but since it seems to be pushing Marian to be more generous towards Jenny and getting him and Roman closer together, we're calling it a win-win.

Roman awesome? Check! Deniz awesome? Check! Richard awesome? Check! Mike? Well, he doesn't totally suck. Axel? EKP is toilet papering his house.

Marian? Well he's not in this ep, but remember back in episode 300 when he suggested pair-skating for men? Yeah. Retroactively awesome, check!

Aldi's alternative descrip: BOUNCE! BOUNCE! BOUNCE!

Shelly's alternative descrip: SQUEE! SQUEE! SQUEE!

Lilith's alternative descrip: ROLLING AROUND IN CONSTANZE'S HAIR. (We'll have to restrain her.)

PS: Yeah, we didn't bother checking the thesaurus for synonyms for "awesome" again. TOO BUSY BOUNCING/SQUEEING/ROLLING AROUND IN HAIR!