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Dark Years Timeline

467-479
480-499
501-510
516-520
522-529
530-539
540-551
552-561
562-569
570-579
580-589
590-599
600-609
610-620
621-629
630-640
641-649
650-656

Episode 590-599

(Remember, please right click and save as... If you wish to stream the episodes, visit our YouTube channel)
Episode Summary sm lg
590

Annette and Jenny have a secret competition about who's the Suckiest Friend Ever to Roman. It's the only possible explanation for so much epic fail. The saddest thing? Annette totally wins. (And hey, at least Jenny provides a cracky dream sequence for comic relief).

56M 59M
591

Meet the new Diana Sommer! With more whiskers, more attitude, and not as many dead husbands (as far as we know). But still short, perky...and well, some people think he's blond.

34M 40M
592

Survivors of Killer Virus, Voodoo, and Julian Lives - sorry, you don't get a break, not on this show. Say hi to the newest harebrained plot, Jenny and Roman are roomies! (Yes, this is a plot, uhm.) Watch as Jenny snags the best room in the flat (conveniently the only one built on-set). Watch as she shoots down Nina's sweet attempts at oh, getting along, and that daft idea: being friends with your roommate! Boogle as she tramples all over Roman because he's so nice and cushiony under her haute couture heels.

All of this definitely deserves a welcome to the neighbourhood party, Y/Y!

64M 67M
593 Word to the wise, Ingo: getting blowjobs from strangers while drunk and in a bad mood = not a good idea. They'll probably turn out to be a demon. Or a crazy stalkerslut spawned by fictional Essen's version of a Hellmouth: the Bad Plot Device Pit. 44M 48M
594

Evil stalkerslut plot thickens! (Or, well. It's trying to. It may just ooze ineffectually in a contrived fashion.) Watch Ingo dissemble maniacally as he attempts to persuade Nicole the stalkerslut that he sucks! (no, Ingo, she's the one who did the sucking, har har.) Watch Nicole stare, sulk, and stalk in a boring, er, sinister and threatening manner! Watch Marian unload his car! ...What? Very important to the plot, really! (If only camera caught him bending over at a better angle. :( )

43M 45M
595

Ever think you'd be happy about DeVa?? Yeah, us neither... but that was before Stella and her insta!friendships with every single character on this show and her forced sage advice. So uhm... HERE'S SOME FAKE DEVA! ENJOY!

In other news, Jenny and Roman's rivalry continues. Jenny is bitchy (YAY!), Roman is bitchy (YAY!), Lars is probably making grunting bitchy noises into his phone (uhm-don't-care-maybe-yay?), and can someone prevent Aldi from embarking on her crazy threesome shipping this time around? Yeah, thought not.

64M -
596-598 Yup, still enjoying the DeVa. We're not drunk, we don't have a temperature, and we're not insane... ah. Erm. Right. Prissy skaters are prissy. Annette has a stalker. OH MY GOD, WHO COULD IT BE??? (Dark years descriptions are hard, y'all.) 58M 60M
599 Nicole the stalker slut worms her way into Annette's good graces by pretending to have a broken heart and developing an unhealthy obsession with Ingo's bathrobe. (Why is Lena the only sane one? This is Lena. We should never be asking that question.) 

And Deniz doesn't want to play Vanessa's boyfriend anymore. If he'd come to that conclusion 150 eps earlier, he'd have saved us all a lot of woe.
60M 65M

600-609 or Back to List

last updated 12/29/09